he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Green mimosas i think yes
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
