chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Randomize