I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
