I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
