we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
