yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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