why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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