how can u be prego again
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
