Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
This beer is not sobering me up at all
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
