So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
