My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
