i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
