we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
