weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I think i peed on brittanys purse
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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