Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy

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  (847): i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy http://tfl.nu/8awt
  Replies (110) Good night (14940) Bad night (1362)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.

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  (509): Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied. http://tfl.nu/w7qp
  Replies (17) Good night (882) Bad night (6032)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.

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  (410): Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad. http://tfl.nu/536n
  Replies (22) Good night (1182) Bad night (3691)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.

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  (716): I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle. http://tfl.nu/lk8z
  Replies (25) Good night (5923) Bad night (1195)
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.

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  (712): Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore. http://tfl.nu/hjm6
  Replies (5) Good night (809) Bad night (3318)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car

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  (713): Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car http://tfl.nu/eifp
  Replies (11) Good night (3524) Bad night (1122)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.

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  (508): NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY. http://tfl.nu/zzc9
  Replies (6) Good night (3054) Bad night (910)
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  (765): View more from Indiana

  I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.

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  (765): I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him. http://tfl.nu/g1zb
  Replies (7) Good night (1401) Bad night (505)
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.

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  (434): You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown. http://tfl.nu/essa
  Replies (3) Good night (1139) Bad night (878)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front

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  (440): New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front http://tfl.nu/k7td
  Replies (2) Good night (411) Bad night (257)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.

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  (210): I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do. http://tfl.nu/dd4u
  Replies (3) Good night (677) Bad night (487)
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  (305): View more from Florida

  I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.

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  (305): I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up. http://tfl.nu/mcl9
  Replies (5) Good night (805) Bad night (376)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.

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  (602): Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy. http://tfl.nu/ej69
  Replies (1) Good night (494) Bad night (360)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.

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  (814): You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios. http://tfl.nu/hqlk
  Replies (3) Good night (273) Bad night (387)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.

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  (480): The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced. http://tfl.nu/7s4x
  Replies (3) Good night (630) Bad night (229)

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