There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Randomize
