He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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