don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
