I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
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