PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
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Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
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And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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