3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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