hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
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