Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Randomize
