have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
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I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
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Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
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