I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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