I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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