the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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