I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
