I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
