Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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