grandma shit on top of the toilet
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
