I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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