How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
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