Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize