? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
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