Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
