Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
