you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
