everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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