it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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