dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Randomize
