Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
