Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
