You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
