Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Randomize
