On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
