Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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