I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize