I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
