is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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