Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
